Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Is it ever a good idea to confront a pathological liar with his/her lies?

i have filed for divorce from a man who basically "stole" my love early in the relationship with stories of war heroism, war injuries, and many, many other detailed and emotional-filled lies. i had so much love, compion and respect for this man..married him, allowed him to adopt my 9 year old son and thought we had a great future ahead...it turns out that i discovered 4 years into the marriage that every single one of these stories were complete fabrications...no war injuries (the scars were from childhood surgeries..per his sister), no overseas service (his dd214) no medals (dd214) no combat, wasn't a navy seal...the list goes on and on--from his cosmetic surgeries he tried to p off as "fight wounds" to "he wrote buddy holly's first song." i'm getting sick just writing about it....question: even though we've been separated for 1 year and a half, i've never been able to really confront him with all of this because a part of me fears that he's so deeply entrenched in his own reality that he sort of actually believes this stuff...the divorce will be final in about 8 weeks, but my frustration and anger level seems to rise every time i see navy seals on tv or listen to him complain about his resentments towards me...i feel that my hands are tied. should i confront him, let my anger out, and force him to face this garbage OR should i just let it all go, realizing that nothing will change anyway and that it might inflame him to do something very irrational and hate-filled towards me?

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